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2021Happiness

68 – About Time – Movie Time Travel as Happiness Advice

by Jill

Is time travel always a chance to go back and do something? Again Is it a chance to fix something that needs to be fixed?

  1. Sometimes you can make things worse.
  2. Maybe your goals are wrong in the short-term or long term.
  3. Maybe the thing you want to change actually made you a better person in the future. Without it, you never cross that pathway that makes you ready to win your challenges.  
  4. You still will have to say ‘goodbye’ at some point.

Challenge

  • Think about something that happened in your past that might give you the temptation to fix if you could travel back in time. Now think about all the lessons you learned at all the things you figured out or became a different person because this one thing happened. What would change about you now if that thing did not exist?
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2021Happiness

67 – Follow the Red Nose to Your Dreams

by Jill

What Matters Most – If you are stuck in life, find out what means the most to you. What do you spend your Time learning and growing? What can you do that can help your community?

No one is a Misfit – You might be in the wrong job or role, but that does not make you a misfit.

Sacrifice For Your Friends – Rudolph realized he was endangering his friends, so he left to save them. It allowed him to grow up and do what had to happen.

Go Home and Reconcile – Your home is always your home. Allow people to apologize and apologize to them. Everyone does the best they can, and sometimes they mess up.

Challenge

  • Find out what matters most to you, and think of a few ways you can use that to help your community.
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2021Psychology

66 – Observe and Deduce

by Jill

Second part about the book Think Like Sherlock: Creatively Solve Problems, Think with Clarity, Make Insightful Observations & Deductions, and Develop Quick & Accurate Instincts by Peter Hollins.

  • Sherlock Holmes and Observational Skills – Sherlock was able to solve crimes and problems with his keen observation skills and the power of deduction.
  • Five Observational Skills
    • Become a more detailed person, which also means remembering what you observe.
    • Give 100% of your focus which is hard to do in our busy world.
    • Notice the difference from baseline or the last time you saw it.
    • Understand people’s self-perceptions and what is important to them. What are they saying or wearing that pushes that perception? What goes against it?
    • See the big picture.
  • If we want to become more detail-oriented, that we just have to do a better job of paying attention to the little things that we tend to overlook
  • Start with small quizzes about people in the room with you
  • Once you have the big observations down, look to more minor details.
  • Being observational before a crisis can save your life.
  • Pay More Attention to Others – Notice what they are wearing and any clues about them. What are they saying clearly? What are smaller and more hidden messages they might not want you to see?
  • Be Better at Deduction – Deducationis reverse storytelling. What you can you read into the observations you made?
  • Be Impartial with Distance – When you are involved in the object of your observations, you can bias your own judgments.
  • Do your own research to understand a situation properly.

Links

Challenge

  • Spend 10 minutes observation a room or a zoom chat and write a list of things you observe. What can you deduce from these observations?

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2021Psychology

65 – Solve Problems With Sherlock

by Jill

Solve problems With Sherlock and some out-of-the-box thinking. Use SCAMPER and creative problem-solving methods to get out of ruts.

Breakout with SCAMPER Thinking – SCAMPER helps us think about problems with a method that allows use for out-of-the-box. It also can be used for complex issues.

  • S is for Substitute  – Can you replace a problematic person or material to fix the issue. For example, does your bathroom need a new sink so you can avoid a common annoyance?
  • C is for Combine – Combine one solution for multiple problems.
  • A is for Adapt – Change the situation so solve a problem
  • M is for Magnify or Minimize – Enhance, embolden, magnify or shrink and reduce aspects to find a solution.
  • P is for Put to Another Use – Use something working to solve a different problem.
  • E is for Eliminate – Remove items or processes which are causing problems.

The Creative Problem-Solving Method

  • Identify Messes – What is the mess that you need to solve? For example, there is a puddle on the floor.
  • Look for Facts – What facts are related to the mess? The puddle is by the sink.
  • Find the Problems – There is a hole in the pipe.
  • Find Ideas – Some divergent or brainstorming ideas you can think of to solve the problems.
  • Solutions – Converge on the best ideas that cause fewer problems and solve the problem the best.
  • Actions – Develop the plan to make the solution happen. Ensure you think about the long-term and root causes.

Challenge

Find one problem you are trying to solve and use of the mentioned techniques to solve it.

Links

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2021Goals

64 -Quest Your Goals

by Jill
  • The Nerdist Way – The Book the Nerdist Way helps you take your inner geek and use it to fight for your goals.
  • Design Your Game – The game is yours to design. You set the rules -and you can do it in a way that puts the odds in your favor and makes it fun.
  • Create a Character Page – Create your character page by listing your skill levels from 1-10. The basic skills are Intelligence, Charisma, Wisdom. Strength, Dexterity, Willpower,
  • Define Your Weapons – Your weapons are the other skills, like computer knowledge or sports or crafts. So assign them skill points as well.
  • Set the Experience Points – The game will have experience points for achievements. 5 points are for smaller wins. 25 points will be assigned for medium goals and 100 points for big wins. 1000 points will be needed to level up for the first level and 1000 points after that. Make higher milestone levels have a more significant gap (like levels 10, 25, and 50).
  • Your Game, Make Your Character Obey – It’s your game, and make your character play the rules.
  • Games Give Us Perspective – You shouldn’t take losses personally. It was a setback by an enemy in a game, but you will be the victor next time!

Challenge

  • Develop a basic character sheet. Then, make a few details in each of the categories mentioned above. You can fill in more details later.

Links

The Nerdist Way: How to Reach the Next Level (In Real Life) by [Chris Hardwick]
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2021Goals

63 – Be the GOAT with Neutral Thinking

by Jill

Summary

  • Neutral Thinking is the Key – Thinking with emotion lies to us all the time. It tells us we can’t do things. It tells us we deserve things when we have not earned it. By looking at things with a cool, calm eye, we can see the fundamental goals and the actual hurdles in the way.
  • Have a Plan – If you wanted to drive somewhere or cook a meal, you would have a recipe or a route, but we think we can win things without plans. A solid plan will get you to the goal you are striving to obtain.
  • Be the GOAT With Behavior – Tiny behaviors move us toward goals. We can never be the best until we get these behaviors in line. Every meal or bedtime or every action moves us towards the goals or away from them.
  • You Don’t Have Choice – You think you have choices, but in the end, the path to success is narrow, and you have to follow the way that other people who succeeded with your goals have gone down.
  • Review with a Neutral Eye – Review your goals and the path and your progress with a neutral eye to determine how you are doing. For example, what do you need to change, or what would you need to keep going to succeed.
  • Put In Guardrails – Guardrails protect us from going into the ditch. However, they can be limited to protect our successes. How can you put in guard rails in your life to keep your goals from being lost?
  • The Little Choices Matter – to get to the right behaviors, you have to follow tiny decisions. These decisions have to do with the tiny behaviors that either move you towards your goal. Once these decisions are in place and the guard drails are set up, you can have more confidence you will get successful.

Challenge

  • My challenge to you this week is to think of one way to make a positive change in the small things you do that’s dragging you away from the one thing you want to get done.

Links

It Takes What It Takes: How to Think Neutrally and Gain Control of Your Life by [Trevor Moawad, Andy Staples]
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2021EpisodesHappiness

62 – With Lagom, Life is Just Right

by Jill
  • Lagom is about having and doing just enough. It is about not having extremes in anything but always using moderation.
  • It means you don’t have too much stuff. It means you do not do too much work.
  • It includes sustainability in life and with things.
  • Don’t allow yourself to be overwhelmed by anything
  • Learn how to be alone and have peace with yourself.
  • Get a capsule wardrobe which means you have a small number of clothes and that most everything goes with everything else. Clear out things you don’t wear or that are worn out.
  • Listen to people and respond with a slow and even tone. Allow yourself to have relaxed conversations.
  • Be kind to yourself and to the people around you.
  • Ask yourself what level of things, money, and activity would provide you the life to experience lagom.
  • It is a philosophy that the greeks had in the “Golden Mean.” It is also a part of the Bible. You can see instances in the stories in both cultures.
  • Find practical and systematic ways to move towards lagom.

Challenge

Try to simplify an area of your life that is overly complex. Is getting ready in the morning a hardship? Can you streamline your wardrobe to make it easier? Can you find easier foods to prepare?

Links

Lagom: What You Need to Know About the Swedish Art of Living a Balanced Life by [Barbara Hayden]

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2021Happiness

61 – Get Cozy in Your Own Chair

by Jill

Hygge represents the feeling of coziness and comfort. It is about friends and being with loved ones. Live life without stress. Get your socks, blankies and a hot drink. Sit by the fire or the window and enjoy the quiet life.

Make some cocoa or coffee or soup. Indulge yourself with treats. This is a personal retreat with comfort and carbs!

Use your crafting skills to knit socks or make a blanket. Create whatever makes you comfortable in your space.

Make your home clean and straightforward. Paint it with neutral colors and play calm music. Ensure you have the proper ratio of pillows in your home.

Try to slow down your lifestyle. Greet people and have coffee with them. Enjoy the fellowship with them.

Links

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2021Goals

60 – Grit or Quit? Be the Best or Rest?

by Jill
  • Quit or Grit? Should you stick things out or quit things that are not working? The answer is you have to quit the things that are not beneficial or not what you should spend time on. You should stick to the things you should do for yourself and others. If you are making progress but are stuck. Persevere and take on the challenge to see it through.
  • We like easy things over success or fear of failure. The secret to success and fulfilling life is to go for the tasks that are not easy. Challenge yourself! Accomplish demanding tasks that will progress your life and the lives of others.
  • To overcome a complex challenge, try all sorts of solutions. The best way to overcome complicated challenges is to experiment and look at the task with fresh thoughts.
  • Have an implementation intention. That means you have a plan and a target date to start your tasks. Make sure you know what you will do when hurdles happen, even those inside your own brain. If X then you will do Y. You will now encounter tough times or feelings of defeat or the desire to do the easy thing. Know what your plan will be.
  • Be realistic in all goals and plans
  • Know people who can give you wise advice and introduce you to other people. Find those super connectors in your life. Be a great listener. Help people, including your mentors.
  • Have a realistic view of who you are. When you “believe in yourself,” back those thoughts with evidence of why you should do so. Find proof that you can succeed in certain aspects of your life.
  • Working hard is essential. It makes people great at what they do. But we are not machines, and we need to do other things for our own sanity and improve our productivity. Moreover, other people love and depend on us to be balanced.
  • Know what your work and life expectations are from others. Ask them if you do not know the answer.
  • Have a shutdown ritual, so your brain and body know it is time to step away when you quit on time.

Links

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2021Goals

59 – Can Nice People Get Ahead

by Jill

Do you have to be aggressive or mean to get ahead in the world? On the other hand, can a nice person get ahead and still be the person they hope they are?

Links

Summary

  • Pleasing the Boss is Most Important – Do what your boss expects, and impressing them is the most important thing. People who don’t manage this impression won’t be saved even with outstanding performance.
  • Jerks Thrive – They do get ahead, but it might only be in the short-term because people learn not to trust them and the other people who are “takers” bring them down.
  • Honor Among Thieves – Even evil organizations thrive by depending on other people and trusting them to behave to group members. If an organization is made up entirely of bad people or jerks, the company fails.
  • Can Givers Get Ahead? – Givers give and give too much, and often time they are found at the bottom of organizations or not achieving their goals.  They can succeed by not giving to the point of their own projects failing. By throttling their time, they can thrive while helping others. They can make the best use of their given time and finish their own work and get ahead.
  • Prisoners Dilemma – Is it best to be trustworthy even when it offers you pain, or should you serve yourself even If it costs trust in your own character? Experiments show that people who play a “tit for tat” line will get ahead.
  • Generous Tit For Tat – Be the first to forgive and the first to give. Don’t be the first to misbehave towards another person. Doing “tit for tat” in a generous way will win your trust and friends. The Giver’s best assets are other givers.
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